staring at glass

I was just looking for a creative way to say 'reflecting.'

But seriously--I've been thinking over my recent history--the past year has NOT been the easiest year of my life! And the really crazy thing is...the year before that was the hardest year I'd ever gone through! Ay ai yai.

But ironically, I have not a word of complaint. I have so many things I must do with my life, and the difficulties and challenges I have faced have grown me up at rocket-speed. I have seen first of all how much smaller my dreams are than God's destiny for me; and second, how many million areas he needs to fine-tune/overhaul to get me into position for launching.

My mama told me for 5 years straight what a mouth I had and that I needed to just shut up; amazingly it turns out she was right. There is an art to first knowing the truth, and then knowing WHEN TO SAY the truth. I'm getting there. Slowly. I also took for granted the discipline I learned growing up; I now comprehend that there is HABIT of discipline and then a CHARACTER of discipline. It can be learned but not retained; it must get into the heart and soul and truly be a part of who you are.

Along with all of that I have had to realize that I have not been using my strengths at all to their full capacity...and that is not ok when you plan to take over the world. Great talent immediately incurs great responsibility...and what's most wondrous is that when you DO push to absolute excellence in every area, you discover that you are far more able than you ever imagined.

This is my trip to the looking glass tonight.

Ciao.